


I'm Done

by AlphaKittenX



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Angst, BL, Feelings, Feels, Love, M/M, Yaoi
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-03-31
Updated: 2015-04-14
Packaged: 2018-03-20 13:42:31
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,203
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3652509
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AlphaKittenX/pseuds/AlphaKittenX
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Eren X Levi. They have been dating for 2 months now but Levi is acting weird. ignoring, avoiding, shouting. Eren's hurt. For how long can he stand this before he breaks down?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Eren X Levi
> 
> I'm done

I hate this feeling. I'm feeling so heart won't calm down, it feels like my heartbeat is out of control. Why? Why do I have this feeling? I should trust him not suspect him. Suspect him of what? Cheating? Losing interest in me? Please, let this feeling leave...

I knocked on his door, '' Levi... Can I come in? '' It was late at night and I felt lonely, the same as always.. I didn't get any answer so I went in. There was Lance Corporal Levi sitting in his chair, his face in folded hands. I walked closer. '' Levi, what's wrong? '' I couldn't stand seeing my lover in this. He looks drown in pain. I heard him mumble something. '' What did you say? '' I asked calm. I reached out to touch his shoulder. He tightly grabbed my wrist before I could touch him. '' The fuck are you doing, brat? '' I stared at him with shock. He spat the words out with so much hatred. '' W-what? '' I asked confused. The grip on my wrist tightened. '' L-levi, let go you're hurting me. '' He yanked me backwards. '' Leave. Now. '' I stabilized myself. '' Oi! What the fuck is wrong wi- '' '' FUCK OFF YOU PIECE OF SHIT! '' Now I remember how scary he can be. I was frozen. When Levi stood up I bolted out of the room.

I sat down in the mess hall. Things have been this way since a month. Levi and I started dating 2 months ago. I already knew I loved him and he said he liked me. The first month was okay, stealing kisses, forced cuddles by me. Not like a regular couple but it felt right for us. Pretty soon everyone knew about our relationship. I didn't really mind. But this month was different. Levi is ignoring me, avoiding me, shouting at me, glaring at me. He won't come near me and if I do, he won't let me even touch his hand. I miss him. I love him. I want him. I want Levi back. But apparently he doesn't want me. He probably grew tired of me. Yes I know he shouts and glared at everyone but this really hurts. I can see the despise and disappointment in his eyes. Maybe he's cheating on me. Which would be funny since this relationship is more like an 'one-sided doomed to fail crush'. It has already failed. Or he doesn't want something to do with a monster like me. A 15-year-old brat like me. An impulsive aggressive idiot like me or a suicidal bastard like me.

He doesn't want me. He doesn't like me. He never wanted me. He never liked me.

I'm just a piece of shit that should disappear.

I can't force Levi to stay with me. I'll let him go and disappear from his life.

Shit I'm crying. The flow of tears never ended that night.

'' Eren wake up. '' I cracked my eyes open. My body never felt heavier. My head hurts. My back hurts from leaning on a table the whole night. '' Why are you crying? '' Am I still crying? Even in my dreams... But this are happy tears. I dreamt of my first time with Levi. How he held me, treasured me, whispered sweet nothings in my ear and that he would never let me go. My heart hurts.

I didn't say anything, I just stood up and left Armin alone. Just as I wanted to leave Levi stepped in the mess hall. I turned into statue. My breath stopped, my heart stopped, my world stopped. He saw my face and his eyes widened a bit. He walked up to me, grabbing my waist. '' Eren, why are you crying? '' what? I looked into his slightly worried eyes and snapped. I flinched away, holding my waist protective. My eyes stood wide open with shock. Tears flowed out of my eyes and racked breaths left my mouth. I looked like a total wreck. '' D-don't touch me. '' I couldn't hide it anymore. It's too painful. Armin had left the room noticing we needed time alone.

'' Eren...? ''

I can't do this anymore.

'' Let's break up. ''

There was a minute of silence. '' I'll disappear, don't worry. You don't have to see me anymore except for training. '' I laughed sheepishly. '' I'll get my stuff from you room as soon as possible. You don't have to kiss me anymore, oh and I won't force any hugs on you anymore. Know that I still love you and probably always will but I can't take the pain in my heart anymore. If you didn't want me anymore, why didn't you just broke up with me? Why did you let it get this far? '' I didn't dare looking up from the ground. '' You won't even let me touch your hands, I'm just a piece of shit, right? '' I'm surprised the words came out so easily. Still Levi said nothing. '' Goodbye Levi. ''

I'm done.

I passed Levi and walked away. I could Levi hear mumble something. This time I heard it:

Don't go...


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's late, I wanted to upload it, so srry I didn't re-read it. Grammar mistake's a there somewhere xd please enjoy!

Chapter 2:

'' Don’t go...'' 

Eren’s POV

I thought I would feel the same again. That the pain in my heart would cease. I can’t look Levi in the eye. If I see him my heart would break even more. I still want him. Each time I’m forced to see him, I wanna kiss him and beg him to forgive me and take me back but he doesn’t want me. We’re avoiding each other, that is pretty clear to everyone. Everyone feels the tension in the air. 

Normal Pov:

'' Yo shorty. '' Hanji marched in Levi’s office without any warning. '' What do you want? '' It wasn’t a real question. He already knew why she was here. Hanji slowly approached his desk, sitting in the chair across him. '' It’s about Eren. '' Suddenly Hanji calmed down, talking almost carefully. Levi sighed, '' You know I don’t wanna fucking talk about it. He’s gone, I lost him. He hates me, can’t blame him. '' Hanji’s face twisted into a sad one. '' Oh you don’t, listen to mama Hanji. '' Levi willingly placed away his papers to listen. 

'' You have no idea how he looks at you. '' Levi averted his eyes. '' With love, Levi. With hope. He’s a hurt puppy and thinks you hate him, played him, don’t want him, never wanted him. He’s ready to beg you to love him but doesn’t because he doesn’t want to force you. '' Levi’s eyes widened, then clearly saddened. '' I lost him, avoided him and concious hurt him. You’re talking bullshit. '' Levi sounded pretty much done with the subject. '' Levi, that are his words. I talked to him. He broke down. The poor boy’s only crying. If you don’t hurry he might seek comfort by somebody else. You haven’t lost him, yet. '' Levi remained silent. '' Do you love Eren? '' Did he love Eren? Levi had never said it out loud before. 

'' I do, I love him. '' 

It sounded insecure and the words felt weird coming out of his mouth. 

'' Then why did you treat him that way? You totally changed after the first month. '' Again Levi averted his eyes. '' Stop averting your eyes and talk. '' Hanji switched to strict, shocking Levi a bit. '' I got scared after that month. It was so nice that I got scared. I never had anything with anyone this serious like with Eren. I never opened myself like this. Automatically I started protecting myself, with the result of hurting Eren. Unfair and mean, I know... I didn’t want to be so mean to him, he doesn’t deserve it. I want to kiss him, hug him, hold him like our first night together. Each time I see him, I wanna kiss him. Each time he avoids his gaze from mine, It kills me. I feel a pang of guilt in my heart. Damn I’m getting old and soft. All that brat’s fault. '' Hanji softly smiled. She knew it. Levi just had to admit it so himself. '' He wants you so bad Levi. Go talk to him. '' Hanji could see Levi hesitate. '' Just go, you’re acting like a virgin. '' 

*Time skip by soft Levi and Mama Hanji*

 

Eren’s Pov:

Dinner time. I hate it. I’m forced to see Levi. I’m forced to feel his presence. I could feel his gaze piercing though my back. It felt weird and made me uncomfortable. I didn’t look on purpose. It’s the first time in a while he’s looking at me and so intense. I’m not the only one who noticed the stare. '' Eren, you okay? '' Mikasa asked concerned. I nodded insecure, '' Yeah.. '' 

Okay I couldn’t handle it anymore. Aggressively I spun my head around to lock eyes with Levi. '' Shit... '' I know that look. The looked at me the same way when we had sex, with lust. This isn’t normal tension. Levi’s creating sexual tension. Unconsciously I returned the gaze. I missed his lips, gaze, body, touch. I just couldn’t resist. As I looked him in the eye, I licked my lips, biting it afterwards. That seemed to do the trick. Levi stood up from his seat. Slowly strolling my way. And again I wasn’t the only one that noticed it. The whole room was dead silent as Levi stopped in front of me. The tension was almost not bearable. Everybody held their breath.

Levi extended his hand, for me to take. A bit confused but not breaking eye contact, I took his hand. He pulled me flush against him. His hand resting on my lower back. '' Come. '' I didn’t even reply, I just followed. Walking behind The Devil himself.

Levi dragged me with him. I kind of stumbled behind him. I had seen his face. It was lust, right? I had seen it right, right? Or is he going to beat me? What is he plotting? Where are we going? Levi gave my hand a soft squeeze, giving me all the reassurance I needed. My mind felt at ease. 

We stopped in front of a door. Levi’s room. He opened the door, leading me in first. I had been here only once. When we made love. It felt so good. I could still feel Levi’s touch on my body. I threw the thought away. This is no time to think about sex, idiot. Focus. '' I see, I finally caught your attention. '' Levi’s voice was a bit dark. '' Yeah.. '' I only nodded. '' I wanted to talk to you, so please listen. '' I fidgeted around, a bit curious but also scared. '' I’m gonna say this once and quick, no sappy shit. '' Again I nodded. I felt my hands sweat. Levi sighed,

'' I was scared of my feeling for you I got after the first month, so I pushed you away. I’m not used to feel these emotions. I understand you hate me, but now that I never not wanted you. I will always want you. I also thought you could get better than me. Someone your own bratty age and with a not so crappy attitude. '' I stood there with a blank stare. When everything got though my mind, it shocked me. '' You should have told me. It really did hurt, the way you treated me. I honestly thought you were playing with me. But after I heard your explanation, I understand. It really is a Levi action. You push everything away that comes too close. You’ve been though so much, I would do the same. I just wish you would have told me. Then this wouldn’t be necessary. '' Levi’s eyes widened and his face pulled in a frown. 

'' I’m sorry. '' 

Levi felt awkward. What is he supposed to do now? Kiss him? Hug him or would that be too soon? Deep in thought he didn’t even notice the arms sneaking around his waist. '' It’s okay. I love you. '' Eren’s arms felt warm, like a little cocoon. '' Where did I deserve you? '' Levi wrapped his arms around Eren’s neck, laying his head in the crook of Eren’s neck. '' Do you really think you’re the only one who think like that? I have lied night awake thinking that you wouldn’t deserve a monster like me, you could get a normal human. Someone like The Commander. '' Levi gave me a stern look, '' Eren, You know I don’t wa- '' '' Ssstt... I know, I know. '' I gave Levi a caring look, '' Just shut up and kiss me. '' I chuckled. 

'' Yess Sir. '' 

Levi tightened his grip around my neck, pulling me a bit down. I pulled Levi flush against me, a possessive look on my face. '' I love you, Eren. '' A pang of arousal his me deep in the gut. A growl left my mouth as it connected with his. The kiss wasn’t rushed, just very passionate and maybe a bit aggressive. I panted and moaned in his mouth. I missed him, me missed me. I love him, he loves me. I want him, he wants me. My tongue clashed with his and I got a bit desperate. I didn’t want to let go. I felt Levi press his body closer against mine, kissing me harder. Meaning he felt the same way.

I didn’t want to let go, and I wasn’t going to. And I know Levi wouldn’t ever let go of me again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the last Chapter. Levi was a bit OCC but cute and an idiot!

**Author's Note:**

> I'll probably make a chapter 2. lately i've been into the genre Angst. I like the feeling of my heart stopping, stomach dropping, throat tightening. Makes me feel alive and that i acually have feelings xd.
> 
> X


End file.
